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Funeral, Sacrament-based, Holy Day, Holiday, Special Occasion

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Funeral quotes

Funeral quotes

"O LORD, support us all the day long, until the shadows lengthen, and the evening comes, and the busy world is hushed, and the fever of life is over, and our work is done. Then in thy mercy, grant us a safe lodging, and a holy rest, and peace at last. Amen." — The Book of Common Prayer "I AM the resurrection and the life. Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die." — John 11:25-26 "MANY PEOPLE have asked me to tell them about heaven and the afterlife. I sometimes smile at the request because I do not know any more than they do. Yet, when one young man asked if I looked forward to being united with God and all those who have gone before me, I made a connection to something I said earlier in this book. The first time I traveled with my mother and sister to my parents' homeland in Tonadico di Primiero, in northern Italy, I felt as if I had been there before. After years of looking through my mother's photo albums, I knew the mountains, the land, the houses, the people. As soon as we entered the valley, I said, 'My God, I know this place. I am home.' Somehow I think crossing from this life into life eternal will be similar." —Joseph Cardinal Bernardin, The Gift of Peace "NOTHING CAN MAKE UP for the absence of someone whom we love, and it would be wrong to try to find a substitute; we must simply hold out and see it through. That sounds very hard at first, but at the same time it is a great consolation, for the gap, as long as it remains unfilled, preserves the bond between us." — Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Letters and Papers from Prison "FOR SINCE WE believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have died." — 1 Thessalonians 4:14 Unable are the Loved to die For Love is Immortality." — Emily Dickinson "MY LIFE is like a broken bowl, A broken bowl that cannot hold One drop of water for my soul Or cordial in the searching cold; Cast in the fire the perished thing, Melt and remould it, till it be A royal cup for Him my King: O Jesus, drink of me." — Christina Rossetti "i who have died am alive again today, and this is the sun's birthday; this is the birth day of life and of love and wings . . . ." — e.e. cummings "THEY SAY such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days." — Garrison Keillor "DEATH IS a private affair. A funeral is a public occasion. Grief is borne by the immediate family and close friends, that little band of bereaved clustered around the remains. The funeral provides the liturgy where, for a brief interval, grief can be contained while the final separation takes place. It employs a language, chiseled out over centuries, to comfort the grief-stricken where ordinary words fail. Ritual, mercifully, accommodates private grief and public sympathy." — Liam Swords, Funeral Homilies Love, I thought, is stronger than death or the fear of death. Only by it, by love, life holds together and advances." — Ivan Turgenev "THE DEATH of a member of Christ's body is a call to God's people. It is a call to come together, to gather, to remember, and to be sent forth with renewed faith-despite the seeming tragedy of death." — John Allyn Melloh, S.M., Assembly "NO PEOPLE who turn their backs on the dead can live. The presence of the dead among the living will be a daily fact in any society which encourages its people to live." — Quoted in The Oxford Book of Death "WAILING-WALL night! Engraved on you are the psalms of silence. The footprints, which filled with death Like ripening apples, Have found their way home to you. The tears which moisten your black moss Are being collected . . . . Wailing-wall night, You can be smashed by the lightning of prayer And all who overslept God Will wake to him Behind your falling wall." — Nelly Sachs, "Chorus of Invisible Things" "CHRISTIANS can speak about death in terms of gain as well as loss. . . . The fundamental Christian conviction is that, far from separating us from the love of God, death marks the point at which temporal obstacles to our experience of that love pass away." — Amy Plantinga Pauw, "Dying Well," in Practicing Our Faith Give sorrow words. The grief that does not speak whispers the o're-fraught heart, and bids it break." — William Shakespeare, Macbeth "O LORD, you have freed us from the fear of death. You have made the end of life here the beginning of true life for us. For a time, you gave rest to our bodies in sleep and you awaken us again with the trumpet. The dust from which you fashioned us with your hands you give back to the earth for safekeeping. And you will recall it, transforming with immortality and grace our mortal . . . remains." — Saint Macrina (327?-379), sister of Saints Basil and Gregory of Nyssa "MY LORD GOD, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it. Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone." — Thomas Merton, Thoughts in Solitude "GOD POURS life into death and death into life without a drop being spilled." — Anonymous While I thought that I was learning how to live, I have been learning how to die." — Leonardo da Vinci "WE SHALL DRAW from the heart of suffering itself the means of inspiration and survival." — Winston Churchill "PERHAPS THEY are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy." — Eskimo proverb "FOR DEATH is no more than a turning of us over from time to eternity." — William Penn "DEATH IS NOT extinguishing the light; it is putting out the lamp because dawn has come." — Rabindranath Tagore "MAY GOD OPEN to me every pass, Christ open to me every narrow way, each soul of holy man and woman in heaven, be preparing for me my pathway." — Celtic prayer "SAINT JOSEPH, pray for us. Comfort of the troubled, pray for us. Hope of the sick, pray for us. Patron of the dying, pray for us. Terror of evil spirits, pray for us." — Litany of Saint Joseph The presence of that absence is everywhere." — Edna St. Vincent Millay "PRAISED BE my Lord for our sister, the death of the body, from which no one escapes." — Saint Francis of Assisi "LORD, LEAD me out of the ways of darkness; you broke down the gates of death, and visited the prisoners of darkness; you brought them light to let them see your face. They cried out in welcome: 'Redeemer, you have come at last!' " — 1969 rite of the Catholic funeral liturgy "RELIGION ... faces the wreck of worlds, and prophesies restoration. She faces a sky blood-red with sunset colours that deepen into darkness, and prophesies dawn. She faces death, and prophesies life." — Felix Adler "I'M NOT GOING to die, honey; I'm going home like a shooting star!" — Sojourner Truth "LET NOTHING trouble you, let nothing frighten you: Whoever has God lacks nothing. God alone is enough." — Teresa of Avila "FATHER of compassion, shelter them under the shadow of your wings forever and let their souls be bound in the bundle of life." — From the Jewish rite of burial Do nothing to add to the sorrow of a funeral or take away the joy of a wedding." — Father John Cusick "LIVE IN THE glory of God and the peace of our Lord! May you live in peace! May you sleep in the peace of Christ! Live forever in peace! Rejoice in peace! God give you refreshment! God give your soul comfort! Be in peace! May Christ receive you!" — From early Christian funerary monuments

Quotes funerals

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The good listener

Funeral homily stories

In the past few years I've been to more funerals than I care to count as my parents' generation crosses the threshold into all that is unseen. One theme that runs constant at the funerals for mothers is "Mom was a good listener." Despite problems they may have had with their mothers, when it came right down to it, their mothers were their close confidants. Like Mary, the Mother of Jesus, when mothers hear or observe things about their children, they tend to hold these things in their hearts and reflect on them. As their children grow, a mother draws on this storehouse of knowledge to help her children understand who they are and who they are meant to be. For this reason, mothers have a trememdous influence on their children. Yet wise mothers, following Mary's lead, know that their job is not to control or constrict their children or deny them their mission. Our children are our offerings to God. The best we can do is love them, teach them of God's love, and send them on their way with a blessing similar to the one Moses offered the Israelites: The Lord bless you and keep you! The Lord let his face shine upon you, and be gracious to you! The Lord look upon you kindly and give you peace! Amen.

Authors Patrice J. Tuohy

Mary listener listening death funerals mothers

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Simple gestures take the lead

Funeral homily stories

My father, who most everyone knew as Big John—a name that said as much about his hearty personality as it did about his large frame—did not leave this world without a grand sendoff. “Epic” is how one of my father’s friends described his wake and funeral Mass. As de facto patriarch of a large Irish family, many people from around the world made their way to Chicago to pay their last respects. At one point in each evening of his two-day wake, mourners were invited to say a few words about my father. These moments quickly transformed into revival-style gatherings with people waiting in line to “testify” about Big John. They told of his random acts of kindness, his broad embrace of family and friends, his long nights of drinking and storytelling. Aunts, uncles, cousins, friends, and co-workers wanted to describe the impact Big John had on their lives. My cousin John, a young father at the time, described in hilarious detail the many things he learned from Big John, including the art of conversation, how to make a sale, and the importance of pacing yourself during a long night on the town. He then ended his tribute describing one last lesson learned: “We were at the Tuohy Picnic—I was probably 17 or 18 at the time—and Big John was bouncing one of the cousins’ babies in his lap. He looked at me smiling and said, ‘Johnnie, there isn’t anything softer than a baby’s foot.’ At that moment, he taught me what it means to be a man."

Authors Patrice J. Tuohy

funerals wakes storytelling

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Homily stories

23 Apr 2017 - Solemnity of the Second Sunday of Easter; Divine Mercy Sunday, Cycle A

My dad was a regular attendee of wakes and funerals. The natural politician in him made it a good way to stay connected with his people: family, friends, and business associates. The Irish in him made it fun, which meant that, more often than not, my mom, my sisters, and I were in tow as my dad stopped by the wake of a classmate from high school, a buddy from the bar, or a relative we never knew we had. I remember once worrying about not knowing what to say to a grieving widow. My mom said, “Just say, ‘I’m so sorry for your loss.’ That’s it. Remember, this isn’t about your comfort. It’s about offering comfort to someone else who is sad and hurting.” The catechism couldn’t have put it any better. The works of mercy—like consoling the afflicted and burying the dead—are specifically intended to relieve the bodily (corporal) and spiritual suffering of our neighbors. Offering works of mercy to people in pain is our way of paying forward the mercy God showers on us. Divine Mercy Sunday is a good time to remember how we bear witness to mercy through these merciful acts: Corporal: Feed the hungry; give drink to the thirsty; clothe the naked; shelter the homeless; visit the sick; tend to the imprisoned; bury the dead. Spiritual: Instruct the uninstructed; counsel the doubtful; admonish the sinner; bear wrongs patiently; forgive offenses willingly; console the afflicted; pray for the living and the dead.

Authors Patrice J. Tuohy

funerals works of mercy corporal works of mercy spiritual works of mercy

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Homily stories

03 Sep 2017 - Twenty-second Sunday in Ordinary Time, Cycle A

Waiting in line at the funeral home to talk to the young parents who had lost their child of 11 in a tragic bicycle accident, I listened as those ahead of me offered their condolences. Some were very talkative, not leaving the couple an opportunity to speak but a few words back to them. Some shot a myriad of questions at them that struck me as odd: “Can I get you something to eat from the other room?” “You can’t wait for tonight to be over, can you?” Others whispered a quiet, “I’m so sorry,” often repeatedly. A few just lost it when they reached the couple and broke into tears sobbing hard enough that the couple needed to console them. Everyone was genuinely moved by the tragedy, especially parents of classmates of the deceased. The room was crowded with uncomfortable laughter mixing with heavy conversations. I was next in line, still unsure of what to say to the couple, when a classmate of the deceased who found her way unnoticed to the casket started crying loud enough to get everyone’s attention. Her mother ran up to console her. Her sobs turned into loud “no’s” repeated over and over again. The room grew silent. Her lament slowed. I turned back to the couple and realized I was embracing them both. We held onto each other tightly. I didn’t speak a word and neither did they until the lost child’s mother smiled and whispered a simple “thank you.” I nodded and made way for the next person in line. How hard death is to accept. Saint Peter couldn’t stand to hear that Jesus would die, and death hasn’t gotten any easier to accept in our own day. All we can do is hold on to each other, and hold on to our faith that “No” will not be the last word spoken.

Authors Father Dominic Grassi

funerals condolences death Peter

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Homily stories

26 Nov 2017 - Solemnity of Our Lord Jesus Christ, King of the Universe, Cycle A

I go to a lot of funerals. It is the nature of my work as a parish pastoral minister. Before the Mass begins at many of our funerals, a family member will give a eulogy about the one who has died. Recently one of our parishioners died while on vacation with his wife and family. Although he was 78, everyone was shocked by his sudden death. As friends and family grappled with the news, I heard over and over again that no one could say a negative word about him. Joe was kind, and funny, and did not have one mean bone in his body. Not long after Joe’s funeral, the community gathered to celebrate the life of Beth, a woman who had devoted her life to developing affordable housing. It was said that she was a woman of courage, persistence, and integrity whose life’s work made it possible for many people to live in dignity. As I listened to these eulogies, I was moved and inspired. And I find myself wondering: What would they say about me? Will anyone say I was a good person? Have I been kind and generous? Have I been a vessel of God’s love? Have I cared for the least among us? Have I done enough to be welcomed home? When that day comes, will I be among the sheep or the goats?

Authors Peggy Ekerdt

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Homily stories

12 Apr 2020 - Solemnity of the Resurrection of the Lord (Easter Sunday), Cycle A

There aren’t too many things more unnerving than shopping for a casket. Especially when you’re with the person who is going to be in it. When we walked into the showroom to pick one, I was so unsettled I felt a touch dizzy. “Just put me in a pine box and leave me out by the curb,” he loudly announced, smiling to himself, chuckling on the inside. He loved to say outrageous things to get a rise out of people. It was his most distinguishing characteristic. The poor funeral director was understandably shocked by his remark and said soberly, “Oh sir, I would recommend something more substantial.” Our family, however, groaned at the remark. We waved him off and picked out what we wanted. When we sat at his interment at the cemetery—the thick mahogany closed over him—I kept thinking about that day. About how he tried to distract us from our breaking hearts. About how he was thinking about us instead of himself, even while dying. He didn’t care what we put him in because he wasn’t really going to be in it anyhow.

Authors Jennifer Tomshack

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