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A path to God's kingdom

Funeral, Sacrament-based, Holy Day, Holiday, Special Occasion - Sample homilies to be adapted for your use

Special occasion: Renewal of marriage vows Readings: Matthew 22:24-31; Luke 20:27-38 “At the Resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage but are like the angels in heaven.” SOCIOLOGIST Brad Wilcox published a book earlier this year called Get Married: Why Americans Must Defy the Elites, Forge Strong Families, and Save Civilization. Wilcox is the director of the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia, so he has spent his career studying the benefits of marriage and what makes a good marriage. In this book, he uses data to debunk some popular marriage myths. One is that unmarried people are happier than married people—the “flying solo” myth. Another is the “soulmate myth.” (Eighty-eight percent of young unmarried adults agree that there is a soulmate waiting for them somewhere out there.) He also talks about four groups who tend to do marriage well—people of faith is one such group—and what habits and practices benefit their unions, and, subsequently, their families and communities. He says this in the book’s intro: “Not everyone can or should marry. Nor stay married. But for most of us, getting married and forging a strong family is the best way to build a prosperous, meaningful, and happy life.” Wilcox has an exceptionally rosy view of how a good marriage can enrich someone’s life. But he also acknowledges: “Anyone who has been married knows that there are days, months, and even seasons of married life that can leave you angry, disappointed, or dispirited.” That said, he backs up his optimistic claims and insights with stacks of data. If you’re married, hoping to get married, interested in marriage, or wanting to support married couples, check out Get Married. Married people have the special gift (and challenge) of being the main sign of God’s grace, love, forgiveness, and mercy to one particular person: their spouse I mention Wilcox’s book because he’s an expert at marshaling data—and any sociologist will tell you that to obtain good data, you first need to ask good questions. That brings us, in a roundabout way, to this story from Matthew. Jesus explains to the Sadducees that their question concerning marriage is all wrong. They’re asking: “Based on how someone’s married life unfolds, how will things shake out for them in heaven?” Jesus doesn’t say outright, “This is a stupid question, guys!” But he does tell them that they are misled because they do not know scripture or the power of God. So let’s turn this question around. Based on what Jesus tells his disciples about heaven, how can married people live up to the promises they made when they got married? What can spouses do to help each other experience a foretaste of heaven? One thing we know is that every Christian is called, by virtue of their vocation, to be a sacrament to others—a sign of God in the world. Married people have the special gift (and challenge) of being the main sign of God’s grace, love, forgiveness, and mercy to one particular person: their spouse. Each day brings opportunities to demonstrate these godly qualities, and doing so benefits both spouses, not just the recipient. Back to the book for a moment. Wilcox sums up his findings in this way: “Giving ourselves to others—especially spouses and families—is the path most likely to lead us to a meaningful and generally happy life for most of us.” That sounds something like what Jesus told his disciples earlier in Matthew’s gospel: “Whosoever would save his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” People who have been married long enough might feel like married life becomes routine or even a little dull. But Jesus tells the Sadducees one more thing that we should note: at the resurrection, people won’t be “married and given in marriage,” but “they will be like angels.” Imagine that! Angels are divine messengers and guardians. Their bodies are spiritual, not earthly, and angels look upon the face of God. At the resurrection, Jesus tells the Sadducees (and us), everything will be transformed. This puts marriage in fresh perspective. Marriage is designed as a lifelong covenant, but that’s not the same as eternity. Spouses listen up: Your time together is holy. It’s limited. And it’s your path to God’s kingdom come—on Earth as it is in heaven.

Authors Heather Grennan Gary

Special occasion Renewal of marriage vows Matthew 22:24-31 Luke 20:27-38 valentine's day national marriage week

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A path to God's kingdom

Funeral, Sacrament-based, Holy Day, Holiday, Special Occasion - Sample homilies to be adapted for your use

Special occasion: Renewal of marriage vows Readings: Matthew 22:24-31; Luke 20:27-38 “At the Resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage but are like the angels in heaven.” SOCIOLOGIST Brad Wilcox published a book earlier this year called Get Married: Why Americans Must Defy the Elites, Forge Strong Families, and Save Civilization. Wilcox is the director of the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia, so he has spent his career studying the benefits of marriage and what makes a good marriage. In this book, he uses data to debunk some popular marriage myths. One is that unmarried people are happier than married people—the “flying solo” myth. Another is the “soulmate myth.” (Eighty-eight percent of young unmarried adults agree that there is a soulmate waiting for them somewhere out there.) He also talks about four groups who tend to do marriage well—people of faith is one such group—and what habits and practices benefit their unions, and, subsequently, their families and communities. He says this in the book’s intro: “Not everyone can or should marry. Nor stay married. But for most of us, getting married and forging a strong family is the best way to build a prosperous, meaningful, and happy life.” Wilcox has an exceptionally rosy view of how a good marriage can enrich someone’s life. But he also acknowledges: “Anyone who has been married knows that there are days, months, and even seasons of married life that can leave you angry, disappointed, or dispirited.” That said, he backs up his optimistic claims and insights with stacks of data. If you’re married, hoping to get married, interested in marriage, or wanting to support married couples, check out Get Married. Married people have the special gift (and challenge) of being the main sign of God’s grace, love, forgiveness, and mercy to one particular person: their spouse I mention Wilcox’s book because he’s an expert at marshaling data—and any sociologist will tell you that to obtain good data, you first need to ask good questions. That brings us, in a roundabout way, to this story from Matthew. Jesus explains to the Sadducees that their question concerning marriage is all wrong. They’re asking: “Based on how someone’s married life unfolds, how will things shake out for them in heaven?” Jesus doesn’t say outright, “This is a stupid question, guys!” But he does tell them that they are misled because they do not know scripture or the power of God. So let’s turn this question around. Based on what Jesus tells his disciples about heaven, how can married people live up to the promises they made when they got married? What can spouses do to help each other experience a foretaste of heaven? One thing we know is that every Christian is called, by virtue of their vocation, to be a sacrament to others—a sign of God in the world. Married people have the special gift (and challenge) of being the main sign of God’s grace, love, forgiveness, and mercy to one particular person: their spouse. Each day brings opportunities to demonstrate these godly qualities, and doing so benefits both spouses, not just the recipient. Back to the book for a moment. Wilcox sums up his findings in this way: “Giving ourselves to others—especially spouses and families—is the path most likely to lead us to a meaningful and generally happy life for most of us.” That sounds something like what Jesus told his disciples earlier in Matthew’s gospel: “Whosoever would save his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” People who have been married long enough might feel like married life becomes routine or even a little dull. But Jesus tells the Sadducees one more thing that we should note: at the resurrection, people won’t be “married and given in marriage,” but “they will be like angels.” Imagine that! Angels are divine messengers and guardians. Their bodies are spiritual, not earthly, and angels look upon the face of God. At the resurrection, Jesus tells the Sadducees (and us), everything will be transformed. This puts marriage in fresh perspective. Marriage is designed as a lifelong covenant, but that’s not the same as eternity. Spouses listen up: Your time together is holy. It’s limited. And it’s your path to God’s kingdom come—on Earth as it is in heaven.

Authors Heather Grennan Gary

Special occasion Renewal of marriage vows Matthew 22:24-31 Luke 20:27-38 valentine's day national marriage week

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Homily stories

06 Oct 2024 - Twenty-seventh Sunday in Ordinary Time, Cycle B

I've been married dozens of times—all to the same woman. In any relationship you have to keep committing and recommitting as times and circumstances change and you come to know more about your partner and yourself. And so a marriage is not a wedding day but a series of decisions to be for and with the other person “for better or for worse.” Sometimes the internal recommitment comes when you notice your attention drifting away to competing interests. Sometimes it comes after a fight. Sometimes it takes the form of deciding to fight to deal with all those resentments you’ve both been storing up. And sometimes you look across the dinner table and recognize the person you fell in love with long ago, and that memory re-energizes your life together. Through the years there will be plenty of opportunities to let your relationships wither and die. Yet the invitation is not just to endure but to access the love that once called you, to enter again into the dreams of your younger days, and to let your loving commitment blossom and grow in the midst of today’s reality—however difficult that might be. This is the ideal. We all fall short, giving us yet more opportunities to renew those commitments to the best of our ability. The promise at the heart of marriage is the promise God makes to each of us: “Whenever it comes time to decide again, it’s a foregone conclusion that I will always and everywhere side with you.”

Authors Tom McGrath

recommitment Marriage

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